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The next leg of our adventure in Vietnam took us on a
seven hour train journey to a town on the coast called Nha Trang. What we
didn't realise when we started our journey around Vietnam was that 30
April in Vietnam is "Reunification Day" which is a three day public
holiday.
What we also didn't realise was that we were to be the
only westerners on this train and that we had been given tickets in
separate compartments, on a fully booked train. We tried to sit in the
"restaurant" until we were asked to leave so locals could use it and so we
spent the best part of seven hours sat in solitude being stared at by the
Vietnamese!
The following day we had booked a boat trip to go to
the Mun and Tam islands. We were on-board one of two boats that followed
each other around all day. As it was a public holiday the boats
were completely full of Vietnamese, who pretty much stared at us and
everything we did for the whole day!
The first thing to say is that I totally loved 30 April
2006 and Angela enjoyed it. The difference in our opinion stems from the
fact that Angela is obviously much better looking than I am, has lovely
skin and much nicer boobs! I say this not only from the looks she got
from Vietnamese men, but also the women. Do not go to Vietnam if you are
at all self-conscious, they stare and stare and even stare when you look
straight at them! They also want to touch you to see what your skin feels
like! Some politely ask, some sneakily touch you and others just grab
hold of whatever is closest! Literally! I even got grabbed by the balls
at one point, by the "guide" on the boat!
The "guide" tried his hardest from the minute we
boarded the boat to make us the entertainment for everyone, but I don't
think it would have made much difference anyway! Everything we did was
eagerly watched and discussed.
Firstly we set off to an island with awesome corals and
fish to snorkel, but as there were so many boats ploughing up and down
over and around the swimmers we decided to go for the safer glass-bottomed
boat option! Also, Angela really did not want to take off her clothes and
reveal a swimsuit at this stage, as I genuinely think the people on board
would have called all the other boats and swimmers over to see!
We then headed off to another island where we anchored
and lunch was served. This was great, as loads of different types of
Vietnamese food was placed in the middle of the boat and everyone sat
round the outside of the boat and helped themselves. Shortly after the
fun began again! For myself I was suddenly not the entertainment, but one
of the gang. For Angela, unfortunately she became the entertainment
on-board and one deck-hand, or Mr. Octopus hands I should say, had the
time of his life!
The "guide" launched himself into the water and sat in
a floating bar. The wine and beer he had was free, but the condition was
you had to be in a life-saving ring to get a drink. Free beer was a big
enough incentive for me so I launched myself very quickly off the boat,
grabbed a life-saving ring and swam over to the bar. Here I was greeted
by the Vietnamese men who had all done the same. They all wanted to say
cheers, in both English and Vietnamese and find out where we were from,
etc. Off the boat they plucked up the courage, with a few beers and
glasses of wine, to talk to me rather than just stare! Oh, the wine they
were drinking by the half-bottle at a time, was actually port!
Angela, decided to join me, but as she does not like
being out of her depth wanted to put on a life-jacket. This was were the
fun really began. The jackets are made for Asians. Asian men are an
average of fifty kilos, half my weight, and the Asian ladies don't have
big boobs, they wear heavily padded bras, etc! So Angela trying to put on
a life-jacket was great fun for everyone else on-board. The deck-hand I
mentioned, well his eyes nearly fell out when he tried to help Angela do
the zip up and her boobs squashed together! He repeated the action
several times apparently! He then dragged her across the boat and tried
to throw her in the water. The skipper must have noticed this guy was
being an idiot because he came and shouted at him, after which the same
guy then spent the rest of the day apologising to us!
Our next destination was a beach resort, which they
made you pay to get on. It was absolutely packed with Vietnamese and
there was no shade at all, so we stayed on the boat. The other boat were
having a party as they were all from the same company and had brought
their own food, wine and beer. They noticed we were left on the boat
alone and one of the ladies came and asked me if I would dance with her.
Well, actually she grabbed me by the arm and whilst asking, started to
pull me over to the other boat! They also were seeing how far they could
push us, but at the same time as trying to make us the entertainment they
genuinely wanted us to enjoy the day with them. After all the free drink
at the floating bar, these guys now started to ply us with local food and
more beer and wine! I think I was asked to dance so they could see how
"Westerners" dance, although I'm not exactly sure I was the best person to
demonstrate this!
After an hour they all disappeared onshore and the
skipper invited us to join him and a couple of the crew for a drink at the
back of the boat! This involved serving each other beer from a bowl!
They had a mouthful sized cup which you drank the beer from, filled it up
and passed it to the next person! We tried to empty the bowl, but somehow
more beer just kept appearing! Result!
Our final port of call was a fishing village where you
could go for a ride in one of the "nutshell" boats. Watching the kids
steer these things was amazing, but given our size and weight and the fact
you had to balance on the edge of it we declined!
The following day we flew to Hoi An, via Da Nang, which
is an ancient seaside city. Here we just relaxed and strolled around the
old town visiting The Phuoc Kien Assembly Hall, which is home to Thien
Hau, the Goddess of the Sea and Protector of Sailors. We also crossed the
old Japanese Bridge, so called because it was built to join the Chinese
and Japanese quarters together and our final visit was to Phung Hung
House, a family home that eight generations have lived in since 1780.
After a couple of nights in Hoi An we drove to Hue, the
ancient capital of Vietnam, travelling over Hai Van Pass and around the
beautiful Lang Co beach. The journey itself was breathtaking, but that
was mainly due to the erratic nature of our driver and the sheer volume of
traffic on the roads!
We only stayed one night in Hue, but we visited the
Heavenly Lady Pagoda, known locally as Thien Mu, the Perfume River, The
Khai Dinh Mausoleum and the Citadel. The Citadel is an enormous south
facing walled complex surrounded by a moat. We entered the Citadel
through Ngo Mon Gate, which has the Five Phoenix Watchtower on top of it.
The gate has five entrances, the middle one for the king, the two either
side for the dignitaries and outside two for the royal elephants. Inside
the citadel we visited the Thai Hoa Palace and then entered the Forbidden
Purple Palace.
On the way back to the hotel we stopped to visit a lady
who makes the circular hats that all the farmers wear. What makes this
lady unique is that she only has one arm, yet is famous for making the
best quality hats in Vietnam. So much so that she was visited by one of
the Popes! If you hold these hats up to the light, they hold a secret,
which is an image of daily life in Vietnam, made by putting newspaper cut
into shapes in between the two layers of reeds.
That evening we were meant to go for a cruise on the
Perfume River to listen to some traditional Vietnamese music. Our
"driver" turned up twenty minutes late, on a moped and looked disgusted
that we were too big to both fit on it! He then made us follow him on
foot, in the rain without an umbrella or raincoat, whilst he drove his
moped to where the boat was! He then disappeared for another twenty
minutes before coming back and saying that all the boats were full and
that we had to back to the hotel! Whilst we were waiting for this nugget,
who had been paid the day before by the hotel to get our tickets,
we watched dozens of other people get on-board at least five boats and set
off for their evening cruise! Oh, he also just walked off and left us at
the river to find our own way back to the hotel in the rain! It wouldn't
have surprised me if he had asked for a tip first though, but he didn't!
Maybe it was the look Angela gave him! |